The Making of a Mentor/Mentee Relationship
“A mentor is someone who sees more talent and ability within you than you see in yourself and helps bring it out in you.” -Bob Proctor
A few years back, I remember googling “Black female dentists in Durham, NC” and stumbling across Dr. Audrey Kemp at Bull City Dental. After doing some further research on her practice and ensuring that my dental insurance would be accepted, I went ahead and scheduled an appointment. My first appointment was a wonderful experience – from the office esthetic, staff and soothing musical selections, everything about the practice made me feel comfortable while receiving treatment. When I had the opportunity to meet Dr. Kemp, I was literally fan-girling… HARD. Growing up, I was never surrounded by anyone that looked like me in the spaces I dreamed of occupying. Now, I realize that I had never really envisioned all that I could become in the field of dentistry until meeting Dr. Kemp.
At the time of my initial appointment, I was working towards applying to dental school and asked if I could connect with her further as I embarked on my journey.
That was the first step towards our relationship as mentor/mentee.
Today, Dr. Kemp has become such an integral piece of my journey. She is a woman that I’m honored to look up to. She is not only a mentor, but a role model in how she serves as a clinician, an advocate, a leader, a mother, a wife, and a believer. I watch her and see so much of what I aspire to become, but she sees me and wants me to be even better. She pushes me to become the best version of myself on a daily basis and she consistently builds me up, even in moments where I may lack belief in myself.
So with that, I encourage you to engage in self-reflection on how a relationship with a mentor could help you achieve your wildest dreams. Do you already have a mentor? If so, are you doing all that you can to make the most of that relationship? Have you thought about finding a mentor, but found the process of doing so difficult?
Below I’ve listed some thoughts on the making of a mentor/mentee relationship and what you should be looking for when seeking mentorship.
Know your “why.”
I believe the key to success is engaging in a relationship with a mentor. The desire for mentorship may look different for you – what is your “why” for seeking a relationship with a mentor?
In my opinion, this type of relationship will lead to accountability, professional development and personal growth as you work towards your aspirations. Find a mentor who will challenge you, believe in you and pray for your ultimate success. One who doesn’t push you to become like them, but sees you and your own strengths in order to help you blossom throughout your unique journey.
Trust, first and foremost.
As a mentee, you will have to establish trust with your desired mentor. Be clear in your needs and what you desire from the relationship and see if it aligns with what they are able to provide. You will most likely have the expectation that the mentor will help guide you in your career aspirations, lifestyle and personal goals in a way that promotes your overall well-being. You should also understand that the mentor will place trust in you as they pass along knowledge that will continue to assist their field of study/career, their community and their interests for generations to come.
Be consistent in your connection.
If your mentor is currently in a place that you one day aspire to, they are most likely busy on a daily basis. You have to be consistent in your interaction to garner all of the knowledge and wisdom you can from the relationship.
Show up in this relationship – demonstrate your passion, interests and efforts to your mentor and they will be more likely to invest more of their time and efforts into you. By staying in touch, you can not only deepen trust within your relationship, but you will learn more than you imagined prior to embarking on this journey.
Confidence is everything.
When approaching a potential mentor, be confident in all that you are and all you are working to become! After all, I’m sure you’ve worked hard to get to where you are at this moment and you deserve to be confident in that.
When seeking any opportunity, I always keep this thought at the forefront of my mind – “the worst I can be told is no.” By maintaining this mentality, it’s allowed me to be confident in the opportunities I’m seeking and it helps minimize disappointment if I’m not able to engage in an opportunity or desired relationship. If you do get a “no” or a “not right now,” don’t be discouraged! Keep trying and know that what’s for you will always find its way – even when it comes to finding the right person to trust as your mentor.
Mentorship is incredibly important in whatever phase of life you may be in and for various life experiences or future goals you may be navigating. Find someone who sees more in you than you see in yourself. Find someone who will never let you settle. Find someone who can already envision you in the spaces you dream of occupying.
It truly makes all the difference in all that you will become.
If you’re looking to find a dental home in the Triangle area, be sure to check out Dr. Audrey Kemp at Bull City Dental! You can visit their website here.
